Blogging with Babys

I am taking a moment away from reading my comics to watch my babies and update the blog.  Sorry it has been a while since i have written, but I have still been keeping the goal of once a week.  Here comes Anna!  Say Hi Anna!
<Daddy, I want some chocolate milk!!!>

Must resist must resist.....YouTube to the rescue!
The other day I was on YouTube looking up a tv show preview for the show No Ordinary Family. Its running on ABC and is about a family that is given super powers.  Kinda like an ABC version of the show Heroes.  A lot like it!  Unfortounately, it also comes on at the same time as NCIS, so we will have to either record it or watch it online.
While I was watching this, I also stumbled upon this other show which is comming on NBC sometime in the future.  I cannot find an exact date or time, but I do know that it is going to be showing 2011 accoding to their website.Its called THE CAPE!  Go figure, me liking as show about a superhero.  I can't wait to watch this and I highly reccomend all of you thousands of peopole that are in the fan club reading this blog.  Watch the preview for it on YouTube and also on NBC.com

Oh, here comes Abby, lets see what she thinks we should blog about
<Daddy, I want Chocolate milk too>

Abby, not you too!   Tough to resist......must use powers.
Speaking of powers, Smallville is currently into its last season.  We are anxiously awaiting to watch it!  While we haven't seen all of the episodes, we have very much enjoyed the show and plan on buying the entire season on DVD when it gets released.  I am still hoping that they will find a way to put Bruce Wayne/Batman into the series.  They have put half the other characters of the Justice League in there.  Why not put the other half of the World's Finest Team?  Today I just found out the awsome news about Teri Hatcher playing Lois Lane's mother in this final season!  I have always enjoyed it when they have used former "Superman" actors and actresses in newer forms of the show.  Smallville has been no stranger from former stars to the show, even having Christopher Reeve in the show before he passed away.  I really can't wait to see this !

<DADDY!!!   We want our bottles now!!!>
Unable........ to........ resist!   Must........ get....... babies........ chocolate ...milk
"DADDY!  What are you putting in their bottles?"  

<Slap him on the back of the head mommy!  He tried to give us chocolate milk!>
"Crazy Daddy!  No giving babies chocolate milk!  They are too little!"
"Oww, yes dear..."

<DADDY!!!! We've got something for you>
WOAH!!!  Looks like i'm going to need some superpowers of my own to tackle these diapers!

Mid Crew

As I may have mentioned before, I am in the United States Marines, Working as a supply clerk in the Aviation supply warehouses. I am stationed here in Miramar MCAS, in beautiful, sunny San Diego. Its a pretty good job and can be very fun if you make it that way. Lately i have been put on the Mid Crew Shift, which goes from Midnight to 7am. I enjoyed the switch from day crew to mid, especially since I now have more time in the day to spend with my baby girls. Brooke is also happy with that too, as they can be quite the handful for her. We are also able to go places during the day that we would have only been able to go on the weekends before, like SeaWorld, Disneyland, various San Diego Museums, the beach, etc. But, like all great things, it has its ups and downs to it.

Socially, all of my friends here on base are either Deployed or on the Day shift, making me have to wait until 4 or 5 if i want to do anything with any of them. We usually compensate that with having lots of get togathers at my house and lots of game day parties to have people come by the house and watch our large glowing rectangle. (see last weeks post, "glowing rectangles" Sunday at Shakey's we call it.

Sleep wise, its a totally different story. Ideally, I've been planning on going to bed around 8pm, waking up at 11:30, going to work, getting home around 8ish, doing some workout and PT, and then going to sleep for a few hours and then spending the day with the baby girls. For the most part, its been working, except for days ending in 'Y'. Sundays and Mondays, NFL season has started and my friend Bonus, is almost always over. Thsi usually won't get me to bed till 9 or 10 somedays. Tuesdays, NCIS is on. Along with it being one of my favorite shows, my children are ADDICTED to it. My Daughter is named Abbigale, after the show's bubbly gothic Forensic specialist, and she loves to see her on tv. Anna, seems to have a crush on one of the big characters on the show, but it seems to change every time. These girls WILL NOT SLEEP, until they see their favorite character Leroy Jethro Gibbs, the head investigator played by Mark Harmon. This character is also famous for slapping people in the back of the head, a motion that my wife is now frequently doing as well! Wednesday and Thurseday there isn't much to stop me so far from going to sleep at my usual time, except for the 3 Redbox movie machines we have on base and the base movie theatre, conviently located 3 blocks from our house. Friday and Saturday nights I try to sleep in, but I usually can't sleep in past 7:30. Those days, I am awoken by the sound of my kids talking to each other and plotting the next mind control scheme of their daddy. Saturdays, I usually head down to the kitchen and make pancakes for Brooke and TRY to bring her breakfast for her in bed, but the babies always foil my plan and get mommy to bring them downstairs to watch cartoons. Sundays, we have church from 1-4, which is especially nice to give us enought time to get the babies ready for church.

Its pretty quiet during my shift, especially since there is only me in the warehouse, and one guy on the other end of the warehouse. Our lights are activated by motion sensers , so I have often thought about getting a remote control car and driving it around to turn on all the lights to psych out the other guy or whoever is there for weekend watch. I usually have a couple orders an hour, or have plenty of gear to stock, so I do usually keep myself busy during the shift. Plus there is lots of things there for me to use to excersize, so I can keep my really really good lookingness.

Not sure yet how long I will be on this shift, but I plan on enjoying all the extra time that I have with my baby girls while I still can. At least until I can invent some baby food that will make them stay cute and little forever

Glowing Rectangles

I love reading The Onion.  Fake news, made incredibly funny.  Recently I saw a headline from them that said : Millions of people waste their time staring at glowing rectangles.  This, is not fake, but is very very true!  People are attracted to glowing rectangles.  Men especially!  Think about it.  Laptops, TVs, Las Vegas billboards, and now new smartphones.  Men are attracted to them like a fly to a bug zapper.  I was walking in the Exchange (base department store) and I passed by the Electronics department, where Avatar was playing on the wall of plasma TVs.  Men were starting and grunting to each other about it as if they were time traveling caveman.  I started to walk towards my fellow neanderthals, but I was soon rendered helpless by the mind control powers of the babies.  "You want to get us some Twinkies, Daddy", they commanded to my mind.  I was rendered helpless and my body proceeded to fill the shopping cart with the boxes of those delicious golden cakes.  This was soon followed by a slap to my head from my wife.

Before we moved out to San Diego, my wife and I upgraded our phones to us both getting Droids.  I love this!  My old phone would drive me crazy, send texts out before I was finished with it, and power off at random times.  This is a fantastic upgrade.  not only do i use it to text, call and check email, but I have the games, apps,etc,etc, etc.  It is my electronic brain.  That being said, if I loose it or break it, i am screwed!  The girls see this as a threat to their mind control powers on me and frequently attempt to take it and drool all over it.  Beautiful little glowing rectangle

A few weeks ago, we bought a new glowing rectangle.  We bought a 54 inch TV from an ad on Craig's List and it has been working wonderfully.  My wife bombarded me with questions of how would the babies like it, would we have room for it, etc, etc.  These were all forgotten the moment she watched Sleeping Beauty on the big box.  My friends here on base have expressed their excitement about it, saying that it will be Sunday at Shakey's for the football games, NCIS, etc.  Much food and excitement has come with this glowing rectangle.

I'm not sure how bad glowing rectangles is with women.  The TV glowing rectangle is on most of the time without my wife's attention, mainly for background noise while she plays with her little phone glowing rectangle and her laptop glowing rectangle.  Her laptop is a small blue netbook which is covered with Twilight stickers and is currently having some problems due to the twins having a battle with it and their super spitty powers. My twins have not had too much trouble with my laptop, especially since the only time they are ever near it, is when they are asleep.  Like now.  Right now I am typing this with Anna asleep on my chest.  Its the best thing in the world, and her snoring is very very cute.  Perhaps i will record this and play this forever on a glowing rectangle to embarrass her at some point in her future

FEED ME DADDY!!!!

My wife (She who MUST be obeyed!), is a big fan of Star Wars, and I think our Twin Baby girls, Princess Drool and Abby-Normal, have been following her.  This may be due to their early corruption in the woomb of Brooke playing all 6 Star Wars movies for them to hear.  These kids have unnatural powers and are in my opinion baby JEDI!  They are mainly effective on me, not so much on their mother, and also their Uncle Ian, Uncle Harold and their Grandpas.  They look at me an render me paralized as well as a loss of all control of movement.  They hack into my head and put crazy ideas into my head to get me in trouble.  Two weeks ago, we had been looking at going to Disneyland in a few months and looking at what to do there.  They both stared at me and put the thought into my head that they needed to go NOW and they needed to go on the Indiana Jones ride!  I was not in control of my own words and actions when my wife says I argued with her unceasingly about their right to go on the rides in the happiest place on Earth as if I were the late Johnny Cockran!
Don't get me wrong, I have a good working brian on my head, its just being controlled by two little ones! Take food for example, for this is the other big clash my wife has with me.  She seems to think that I have no idea what babies eat and don't eat.  I know very well not to give them a steak. However, if that steak were to be processed into mush, then it could be fed to them without the requirement of teeth. Growing up, my mother had a baby food masher that she used to feed us fresh fruits and vegtables to us before we got teeth. Apparently this doesn't work with everything, according to my wife
This afternoon, I was enjoying some chips and guacamolie and I had the strangest notion to feed my little girl some.  These girls work in very curious ways.  They persuade me to feed  them things and make it seem like its a reasonable thing for them to eat.   Guacamolie is in a easy form that doesn't need teeth like applesauce and pudding, two other things that they have tried to get me to feed them.  To a guy, this would seem almost a reasonable thing and would not take much persuation from them.  I then try to give them some, being in full control by them, and then get caught by my wife right before they are feed it!  My wife then slaps the back of my head, as she learned from Gibbs off NCIS. 
The girls are especially bad as the day goes on.  They try their hardest with me when it comes to ice cream.  They have so much brain waves going to my head, its possibly going to turn me
into a vegtable someday!  I know they shouldn't have ice cream and I put up as much resistance as possible, but the two forces are so much in oppositon that i temporary loose all my movement abilities and ice cream ends up all over my wife's face.  She is not amused ,especially since i was eating chocolate cookies and cream and it got chocolate all over her white pj's
Just nowAnna tried to get into my mind. My wife stepped out of the room and Anna started fussing while she was playing on the floor.  I picked her up and made a silly face to make her smile. She turned her head to look at me and telepathically said to me, "You know daddy, some chocolate frosting would help mefeel better!"  I resisted as much as i could as she controlled my hand to grab the chocolate frosting on the couch that my wife had been dipping pretzles in.  I took control and started to take the frosting to the kitchen when my wife came back into the room and saw me with the frosting in one hand and the baby in the other.  Anna then when into my wife's head, and told her that I was plannning on feeding her the entire jar of frosting.  Here it comes, untill next time, lets see if I wrap tin foil on my head to resist the babies.
  (SLAP!)

Finally the life and times of Me begin!

Hi everyone!  I'm Sterling, the Marine of Steel!  And now I am finally establishing my blog!  I won't bore you to death with my entire life story, or history of my family, or detailed list of all of my head injuries as a youth.  Those you can find in the complete history of Blakely volumes XX-XXVII.  It sufficeth me to say that growing up I always had a crazy life and things to joke and laugh about.  This gained worldwide popularity in the Massive letters that I would send home to my family as I was serving a Mormon Mission in Washington, DC.  It was my intention to keep the humor, commentary and quick whit going on arriving home, but i was thrown with such big excueses such as jobs, marrage, pregnancy (boy did i get huge!)  boot camp, and little twin girls!  Things have somewhat settled down so now the rants and raves are rolling again. 

                 It is my goal to write this 2-3 times a week, which should leave me enought time to spend time with the girls, eat my body weight in peanut butter,gulp down a Dr.Pepper, and do the awsome Marine job that I do.  Forget about sleep for me.  Sleep is not needed.  Marines don't sleep, they just wait.  My wife has not stated how she would like to be mentioned in this, and she will formally be know for the time being as She Who Must Be Obeyed.  My twins, Abbigaile and Annaliese will also be mentioned by the nicknames that I have given them of Abby-Normal and Princess Drool!  Pictures will be posted as soon as I can reach a good contract with the Paparatzie.
                 I do not fully allign myself Republican or Democrat, as I see many good things in them.  However my full allegience is to food and the eating of it, a cause that I have established and have triumphed with these many years.  I do not mean to offend , but entertain and enlighten.  Some posts may be more spiritually filling, others more laughter will overwhelme you.  Feel free to e-mail me with your thoughts, comments, donations, ideas and Dr.Pepper recipies.  If i mention things to confuse you, try looking in past blogs for references or just email me, especially now as I have no other previous posts yet.  Althought I do make this look easy, its pretty hard to be this good looking and this cool. 

I attribute this blog to all of my parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles who have taught me the redneck ways of life, the power and pride of politics, the art and wonder of Comic Books, and to always follow my dreams and to be true to my name and be "Sterling" in all that I do.  I especially thank my Uncle Harold for never giving up on me and always supporting me in everything.  Special thanks also to my best friend Ian, my partner in laughs and capers.  My wife and kids are a big inspiration for this and I want them to know I love them very much.
OOH RAH!