Glowing Rectangles

I love reading The Onion.  Fake news, made incredibly funny.  Recently I saw a headline from them that said : Millions of people waste their time staring at glowing rectangles.  This, is not fake, but is very very true!  People are attracted to glowing rectangles.  Men especially!  Think about it.  Laptops, TVs, Las Vegas billboards, and now new smartphones.  Men are attracted to them like a fly to a bug zapper.  I was walking in the Exchange (base department store) and I passed by the Electronics department, where Avatar was playing on the wall of plasma TVs.  Men were starting and grunting to each other about it as if they were time traveling caveman.  I started to walk towards my fellow neanderthals, but I was soon rendered helpless by the mind control powers of the babies.  "You want to get us some Twinkies, Daddy", they commanded to my mind.  I was rendered helpless and my body proceeded to fill the shopping cart with the boxes of those delicious golden cakes.  This was soon followed by a slap to my head from my wife.

Before we moved out to San Diego, my wife and I upgraded our phones to us both getting Droids.  I love this!  My old phone would drive me crazy, send texts out before I was finished with it, and power off at random times.  This is a fantastic upgrade.  not only do i use it to text, call and check email, but I have the games, apps,etc,etc, etc.  It is my electronic brain.  That being said, if I loose it or break it, i am screwed!  The girls see this as a threat to their mind control powers on me and frequently attempt to take it and drool all over it.  Beautiful little glowing rectangle

A few weeks ago, we bought a new glowing rectangle.  We bought a 54 inch TV from an ad on Craig's List and it has been working wonderfully.  My wife bombarded me with questions of how would the babies like it, would we have room for it, etc, etc.  These were all forgotten the moment she watched Sleeping Beauty on the big box.  My friends here on base have expressed their excitement about it, saying that it will be Sunday at Shakey's for the football games, NCIS, etc.  Much food and excitement has come with this glowing rectangle.

I'm not sure how bad glowing rectangles is with women.  The TV glowing rectangle is on most of the time without my wife's attention, mainly for background noise while she plays with her little phone glowing rectangle and her laptop glowing rectangle.  Her laptop is a small blue netbook which is covered with Twilight stickers and is currently having some problems due to the twins having a battle with it and their super spitty powers. My twins have not had too much trouble with my laptop, especially since the only time they are ever near it, is when they are asleep.  Like now.  Right now I am typing this with Anna asleep on my chest.  Its the best thing in the world, and her snoring is very very cute.  Perhaps i will record this and play this forever on a glowing rectangle to embarrass her at some point in her future